Worries of a parent

On a daily basis I tend to worry or think about Kenz's future. It is usually after she does something silly or learns something new. Shes such a bright little girl but I worry if she will ever share her knowledge with the world around her. Next year she will be starting preschool and I worry about her talking to her teacher. She is such an absorber of knowledge. She learns so much when at daycare or school as she calls it and in sunday school. I feel like I am always telling people about new things she learned, it would just be nice for them to hear it firsthand. I just don't want Kenz looked over in a classroom because she doesn't talk. I'm hoping with continuing therapy she will blossom and become the chatter box she is at home everywhere she goes.

1/25/11: the ups and downs of SM

Therapy this week was amazing!! I couldn't of been any happier with the way Kenz was responding and being involved. She was cracking up laughing at everything. She kept dancing and showing off her light up shoes by jumping. It was incredible for me to just sit there and watch her be so involved with another person just the way she would be with me. Kenz loves using the copier and making pictures, as she calls them of her hand or other toys. One problem has been she will never ask her dr to make one, in the past the closest we have gotten is her pointing or telling me she wants one. As we pack up she requests to make one to me. I told her I am not the one to ask that she needs to ask the dr. She kept looking at him and after a few minutes I reminded her to ask for a picture. Then we hear, "picture" being directed at Dr. Wartel. She was so excited to know she was able to ask by herself for it and verbally, not just with a head shake. Therapy blew me away so I was having high hopes for dance class the next day.

My hopes were quickly stepped on and squished down when we walked in. It was observation week. Which means almost all parents and a lot of grandparents packed into the dance room. In Kenz's terms it meant her shutting down and anxiety sky rocketing. I tried to have a positive outlook still but it was difficult. She wouldn't do anything on her own. She wanted nothing to do with the gymnastic mats, which I think it was because she would be somersaulting or rolling towards a punch of parents. If I tried to get her to do something she would start shaking and crying. It was tough to watch all the little girls showing off their moves in front of everyone as Kenz just sits there. She shows off all her dance stuff at home, if only everyone else could see it. One thing that was really difficult was hearing another girl noticing Kenz being "shy." As we are leaving I hear this girl say, "look mommy its the shy girl who won't do things in dance." It was hard to hear someone else Kenzs age noticing that shes different. The parents didn't know what to say. Its hard for me because I don't want to constantly explain Selective Mutism to people especially when most people don't even know what it is. There have been many times when people look at me like I am making excuses for her.

01/19/2011

This week Fred took Kenz to therapy. I was curious id she would do differently since I have been the one to mainly take her. He said she started off not being involved but when her dr left the room and went down the hall and came back, she was herself and ready to go.

01/05/2011

Today was Jaxon's 1st birthday! For fun and memories before therapy I took the kids to 12 Oaks mall and we went to Build A Bear and played at their play place. Build A Bear was so much fun! It really helped that the store wasn't busy because Kenzee was fully herself unless an employee was talking to her. She even named her bear(Kat) and Jaxons bear (Fatbear). I think just doing something right before therapy helped her out. She went in there and was showing Dr.Wartel the bears and telling him about playing. It was a great day spending his first birthday with both of them. I still cannot believe hes a year old already!